To Push or Not to Push…
To Push or Not to Push… That is the Question.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I have learned a lot about birth over the years. I have seen a lot of patterns in labor that lead to the “same” outcomes. I have heard a 1000 variations of generally the same story. One thing I had not seen a pattern in was a C-Section that was needed NOT bc of Pitocin causing fetal distress, NOT bc an Epidural slowed things down resulting in “Failure to Progress”, & NOT bc a true emergency arose. No, the one trend I had not put two & two together was a C-Section that was needed due to the poor advice from a medical professional over this issue of To Push or Not to Push.
I have 2 dear friends who went through nearly the exact same scenario. It’s almost eerie how similar their birth stories are! I would like to share these 2 birth stories with you (with their permission, of course!) and then tell you my analyzations. 
For privacy purposes I have chosen to not list their names specifically.
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Friend A was excited about doing a natural birth. She and her husband went to childbirth classes. They practiced and prepared for a normal, healthy, natural birth. They did a lot of research about where to deliver and what birth team to have for the best possible experience and outcome. The big day finally arrived and Friend A started her labor right on track. She worked with her contractions with relative ease. She made it through transition like a champ! Things were going great!
When she was checked in late labor for progress, it became clear that she still had a lip of cervix that had not fully dilated (a common occurrence in first time moms). She was encouraged by her medical provider to push with the next many contractions to help that lip move out of the way. So with each contraction she pushed & poured her energy into bearing down, in hopes that it would move things along. As time went on it became clear that this wasn’t working as hoped. She was checked mid-contraction to see that as she pushed her cervix was going from a 9 to a 4 due to swelling. By this point her cervix was agitated, stressed, & swollen due to pushing.
Realizing that pushing was hindering and not helping she was instructed to not push any longer, but her body’s natural urge had taken over she began to feel the urge to push, and had to work against it during each contraction, in hopes that it would allow her cervix to return back to normal. Contraction after agonizing contraction she fought. Eventually, an epidural was administered in hopes that some time for mom to relax would help that lip open up and her cervix would become less agitated. Hours later her cervix finally did relax and dilate fully and pushing began.
Unfortunately at some point her baby got wedged into an awkward position and was unable to be born vaginally. A C-Section was needed. Friend A was a champ, an admiration to me in all she went through. Baby was healthy, beautiful, alert and happy. Baby weathered the birth so well, not a single sign of fetal distress was shown throughout it all. Friend A was disappointed, exhausted and overwhelmed, but so strong. I analyzed for a while what might have caused Friend A’s situation to occur as it did. Her body was capable… something else got in the way.
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Friend B and her husband also took childbirth education classes. They researched their birth place of choice and the medical staff thoroughly. They read, studied, prepared for a natural, drug free birth. Excitedly, the big day arrived! Friend B worked with her contractions, listened to her body and took one contraction at a time. Her coach was supportive, encouraging and a vital role. The labor progressed smoothly. Friend B pressed forward.
After roughly 13 hours of labor Friend B was encouraged by her medical professional to start pushing with the contractions to see if it wouldn’t help “speed things up”. She did as encouraged. Contraction after contraction mom became more and more exhausted as she put forth so much energy pushing. She was checked, and it became clear that each time she bore down to push her cervix was swelling and digressing in dilation. In the end a C-Section was needed. Friend B was disappointed and confused as to why her birth ended this way. Her body also was capable… something else was the problem…
~~~~~~~~~~
I was amazed to learn how similar my 2 friends births were. Both took the time, energy and effort to prepare, practice and study. They chose their place of birth wisely & moved forward in trust of the natural process. Both seemed to labor well, with things moving right on track. Both were encouraged to push BEFORE their body naturally told them to & both ended up with a abby in a “mal-position” and a C-Section.
Our bodies are amazing during labor. Baby can communicate to mom throughout labor and really sit in the “drivers seat” throughout the birth. Baby can tell mom when they need a break and cause what has been dubbed the “Natural Alignment Plateau” where labor progresses but does not increase in intensity for many hours (See Blog Post on this subject). They can push against moms uterus while in labor to make sure they get into the correct position. If a mother was to be knocked unconscious for some reason (like a car accident) and she was in labor, baby could in essence deliver themselves.
When we tamper with the natural process and don’t listen to our bodies or are given poor medical advice which encourages a mom to go against her body, we see more negative effects than positive ones.
If you are pregnant remember to LISTEN TO YOUR BODY no matter what anyone tells you. If you dont feel the urge to push, dont push yet. If you feel the urge to push before you have fully dilated, push with that urge (a topic for another day ). If you feel like walking, walk. If you feel like rocking, rock. If you feel like being on your hands and knees, dont let anyone get inthe your way of assuming whatever position feels right to you. We cant fully grasp how intricite our human bodies are, nor how tighly knit the communication lines between moms brain and baby really are. We need to just trust and go with it.
I am saddened by my friends birth experiences. What should have been their first ever, life changing, amazing experience ended in disappointment and confusion. I feel angry for them that their individual medical providers encouraged them in the very thing that was their demise. I feel hopeful for them to not have to go through that ever again. I admire all that they went through in hopes of achieving their natural labors and the strength they have shown in how they have healed from their experience.
Please feel free to comment below. Both girls in this story will read this blog, so feel free to ask questions of them, leave encouraging comments to them or any other comment related to the post that you would like to leave.
~Julie~
| Print article | This entry was posted by Julie Wannamaker on March 30, 2010 at 8:50 pm, and is filed under Baby, Labor/Delivery. Follow any responses to this post through RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback from your own site. |
about 1 year ago
Wow…what a great observation. I have seen the very same thing, I really do believe that if women listened to and trusted their bodies and pushed instinctively things would be so different. Thank you, I will direct traffic your way, what a great entry, may I post this on facebook, and would you like to talk about this on the air. Gena
about 1 year ago
Gena- Hello! Thank you for reading my blog and checking out my website! Yes, you may post this on FB, of course! Anything that spreads the word of what birth should and can be for most women, can be spread wherever it needs to!
I have never talked about a subject on the air before, but I would love to opportunity! I teach natural childbirth classes, so I am not unfamiliar with talking about these topics, just not on the air before! Please let me know the details. You can also email me more specifics if you don’t feel comfortable leaving them online here. 
Julie@naturalchildbirthedu.com. 
about 1 year ago
thanks for this story… unfortunately so often true.
with my 1st i was pursuaded to push, even though i had absolutely no urge to …but i was 10cms so they wanted me to! i ended up with a retained placenta – i feel purely from the midwives actions (they also gave my syntometrine against my wishes!)
with each of my 4 labours i have had this same pause between dilating and pushing contractions (of various lengths)… with my 2nd child i had only had 1/2 hour of intense contractions so was grateful for the short pause…and it gave me belief my body knew what to do! the next 2 then i could welcome the break, and my more experienced homebirth midwife pushed a small anterior lip out the way, and with that i got the pushing urge!
my 4th child was posterior in labour and i had the desire to walk up and down my stairs and lift my legs in a sort of march …which i am sure helped turn him easier. (he was a easy 2.5 hr birth) i know that if i wasnt at home and ‘allowed’ to do what i wanted then this might well have been far longer and more painful.
about 1 year ago
Wow, I had a similar birth story and it’s just so frustrating to continue to hear of others having the same experience. I had an add day pain-med free labor but my OB augmented with pitocin. Once I was fully dilated I was made to stay on the bed (supine) and purple push (counting to 10 three times in a row). It was totally unnatural and didn’t allow my posterior baby to flip over. After almost 2 hours of this, and no distress of baby, I was wheeled in for a c-section. Second baby was ERCS and third was a home birth because I wanted to have control of my own labor.
One thing I was amazed to learn during my hypnobirthing courses is that there are three muscle layers within the uterus that work together to push and turn baby together. We too often intervene with the process. However, the very fact that our country endured Twilight Sleep births is a testament to the fact that our bodies can do this thing on their own. It’s so sad that we’ve turned the process into a medical procedure with counting and forcing and trying to make things happen on our own schedules.
Great post!!
~Shaye
about 1 year ago
This is a wonderful post! After three births I think I’ve finally really understood that I don’t need to do anything except not stop my body!
I’ve had two homebirths (one a VBAC) and while I’ve believed in following my body’s cues all along, I also had too many ideas about how to respond to my body’s cues–like making an effort to push when I felt the urge–and then some ideas about when NOT to follow my urges–like not pushing if I’m not fully dilated.
You can bet that next time there will be no measuring, no calculating, and no rush. It’s ironic that all of the things we do to help things along really just get in the way.
about 1 year ago
Thank you all for your comments & sharing pieces of your birth stories! I love reading them. Shaye- it makes me so happy to hear that even after a C and a repeat C you went for that homebirth in the end! You have NO idea how many women I know that dont try that- and keep having C after C after C.
Thank you for sharing your story! Jo- How interesting that your body has such a set pattern & how great that your experienced homebirth midwife knew what to do! Thank you for posting your story on here. I am blessed that you all enjoyed this post. I enjoyed writing it. 
about 1 year ago
This is very interesting. I have seen a pattern with those on the blogsphere writing about pushing and ‘failed pushing’ (btw, I hope you hear the frustration and disbelief in that quote).
My own two recent posts are here:
http://wonderfullymadebelliesandbabies.blogspot.com/2010/03/push.html
http://wonderfullymadebelliesandbabies.blogspot.com/2010/04/transverse-arrest-two-stories-in.html
Thanks for continuing to bring great information to women of childbearing years.
about 1 year ago
I wonder how common this is when a woman ALREADY has an epi…. and then teh drs tell her it’s time to push, but she can’t feel anything, so she has no idea whether her body is actually ready….
I suspect that any doc, MW, or ANY professional, regardless of how good they are, would be about as good as telling you “when and how to push” as they would be at telling you “when and how to vomit” when you feel nauseous.
about 1 year ago
I can say of my four births, my absolute easiest was the one where I didn’t even push at all! She came completely on her own, with my body doing all the work for me. I would have dozens of kids if they could all be like that one! My last baby ended up being a c-section after many hours of labor. I am convinced that some education for my doctor would have saved me from that. I wasn’t allowed to walk or move like I needed to. I knew that I would stall out at 5 just like I had w/ my other 3 kids. I also knew that once I got past that 5, it would go super fast. Unfortunately, I was talked into getting a “emergency” c-section because she seemed to be stuck and going nowhere. I wish I had been allowed to let my body do what it needed to
about 1 year ago
Val- You should read the blog post Natural Alignment Plateau: (http://naturalchildbirthedu.com/2009/12/23/the-natural-alignment-plateau/). You’re a classic case of the 40% or so of women that experience it. You stall at and 5 and then going fast, is indicative of the NAP taking place. You’re right, had your doctor had some more education on the subject might have made your birth go entirely different. Thank you for you post & for sharing your story.
about 1 year ago
Sam- I would imagine that this can be a huge factor in women needing emergency C-Sections. Being able to feel & experience what your body is telling you to do is a big piece of the picture, you take that out and you add in potential complications.
about 1 year ago
Agreed – babies can do it themselves. Had a pt recently who the MDs did NOT want to push (she had recently diagnosed cancer and extremly enlarged speen – didn’t want to risk rupture) Her baby emerged so very gently. No yelling to “Push! Push!” You’d think that perhaps it could have been a learning opportunity to the residents. . . that we don’t have to have mom’s hold their breath and push with all their might, they can just allow thier bodies to do what their bodies are designed to do. . . Maybe we could allow ALL mothers the chance to birth in such a gentle way. . . .Sadly the experience was lost on them.
about 1 year ago
indeed” ” If you are pregnant remember to LISTEN TO YOUR BODY no matter what anyone tells you. If you dont feel the urge to push, dont push yet. If you feel the urge to push before you have fully dilated, push with that urge (a topic for another day ). If you feel like walking, walk. If you feel like rocking, rock. If you feel like being on your hands and knees, dont let anyone get inthe your way of assuming whatever position feels right to you. We cant fully grasp how intricite our human bodies are, nor how tighly knit the communication lines between moms brain and baby really are. We need to just trust and go with it.”
also, I want to add my experience, the cervix can be iced and a malpositioned baby, can be moved out, of the stuck pelvic position, by doing either the breech tilt (which I used with my third, it disengaged his head so that he could get repositioned again) and with my forth (and my sister did this with her second) was the position for a prolapse cord, where chest down pelvis up, this helped baby better align and be able to be born vaginally (my sister did it in the hospital instead of getting the c-sec, that was recommended)
about 1 year ago
This is my story also. Being told to push and then being timed out, being lied to about 100 thing to coerce me into doing what was most convenient for them. C/s. Anger, confusion, ptsd, suicidal depression.
Almost 4 years later and I am about to celebrate the first anniversary of my joyous unhindered homebirth. A truly life-changing experience. I am grateful for my c/s, for the clarity it gave me, the things it taught me about life and myself. I am also grateful for the community I found who validated my experience and gave me hope that it could be different. And it was. The next time I listened to my body, my baby and my heart for the whole pregnancy and birth. Take heart, it can be different.
about 1 year ago
Thank you all for sharing your stories. The more I learn about birth, the more I’m convinced that I want to have my children at home. Unfortunately I live in St. Louis, Missouri where there is only one midwife and no birthing centers so I’m not sure that I will be able too.
about 1 year ago
When I had my first baby I was “gassed” and did not get to experience the birth. it was back in 1962. For my next baby I was in the hospital, wheeled to the delivery room scared to death because the labor was going so fast. I was shaking and beginning to hyperventilate.
Lying on the “delivery table” legs in the air, a nurse (whom I believe was actually an ANGEL) said to me, “Relax, you are fully dilated. You are not in pain any longer. ” I stopped gasping for breath and realized that she was right. There were no more contractions. I was not in any pain. I felt no urge to push either.
Then She said, “you are one of the lucky ones. You are getting a little rest period. Just enjoy it. In a minute or a few, you will feel the urge to push. When that happens, just do what your body tells you to.” And she was right.
After a few minutes, not long, I felt my body begin to have an urge to push. The strength of it scared me. But I was helpless to stop it so I just ‘went with it’. I believe I only pushed about 4 times and the head emerged. Then one more push and the shoulders slipped out and then the baby slipped out fast.”
I am so grateful to that woman, whoever she was. it was February 24th 1963 at about 6;PM at the University of Virginia Hospital. I would love to tell her how much she helped me to understand birth. Especially in retrospect, I realize that that woman “trusted my body, my birth.” and she gave me the confidence to go on having babies naturally. And to continue my passion for childbirth even now.
I will NEVER forget the triumph I felt pushing that baby out. What a gift!
And I learned that for some women, there is a waiting period in between full dilation and the urge to push. I wish the doctors today knew about this!
If I were having babies today I would do it at home. I have learned a lot since then and feel home birth is safest for mother and baby. Thanks for this thread.
about 1 year ago
Bonnie- Wow! Thank you so much for sharing your story! I have heard much from the gassed era of childbirth and I think that youre right, your nurse was a true angel! Thank you for posting.
about 1 year ago
Jenna- I’ll look into that for you and see what I can find. Homebirth is amazing- absolutely amazing and worth fighting for having one. Lets see what we can do!
about 1 year ago
Tanja- LOVE hearing that you had the healing happen years later with your homebirth. Many women stay scarred by their experiences and keep doing repeat C’s, thinking somehow that they were flawed. You didnt, and I commend you for that.
Thank you for sharing.
about 1 year ago
Kim- Wow, thank you for sharing that extra bit of advice! Its testimonies like yours that need to be shared so women know that they CAN do what is out of the “norm” in certain complications or variations. Thank you for sharing!
about 1 year ago
So many have already posted, but I wanted to share a little something about my labor.
I birthed at home (my first and only so far – she is 12 weeks). I was checked for dilation twice. The first time, I was only about 3 centimeters after laboring all day; I felt like I wasn’t progressing so requested to be checked (funny thing about that was my midwife said I had been to a 6, but had closed back to a 3). I laid down to get some rest and ended up sleeping between contractions from around 12:30am till 7am. The midwife slept in the living room and I was left alone (my husband was sleeping next to me).
When I experienced the urge to push, I worked alone with it for awhile (I mistakenly thought I had to poop, even though I’d read about that and was sure I’d recognize it as what it really was – but I didn’t!). When it became simply unbearable is when I had my husband wake up to get the midwife. She came to check me and my baby’s head was halfway into the birth canal – which was a shock to me. So who knows when I was dilated. Who knows if the urge started before or after 10. All I know is that my body knew when it was time to push. It knew precisely what to do, even though I was mostly asleep and not really aware during contractions, except to hang on to my sleeping husband and freak out a little. I didn’t even have to help my body push to get the baby out. Now, if only OBs had faith (and some patience) in women’s bodies like my midwife did…
about 1 year ago
With my last baby, I had to be induced due to hypertension/possibly pre-eclampsia, 2 weeks before “due date”. I had planned a natural home waterbirth, but when this went out the window, still wanted things as natural as possible.
When I felt that urge to push come, I called the nurses who didn’t believe me, because I couldn’t possibly be fully dilated since the last time they’d checked me. But they did check me, and I WAS fully dilated!
So I immediately got up off my back and into a squat. Room full of nurses and the resident yelling at me to lie down, ‘for my baby’s safety’, hubby yelling back at them (well, not YELLING, but defending me!), me steadfastly ignoring it all. Finally the OB coming in and informing them all that it was indeed my choice if I wanted to squat, so long as I understood the greater risk of tearing. Yeah, whatever.
I listened to my body and she slipped out in just 2 or 3 pushes. I do say “push” even though I didn’t “help” much — not artificially anyway, but I certainly did bear down, it couldn’t be resisted!!!
I had 2 or 3 teeny tiny tears that needed 2 or 3 teeny tiny stitches, which the OB basically declared proving her right. My first baby had been born on my back and my side, 4th degree tears, 30-40 stitches, weeks of pain and healing and scar tissue that remains to this day. Yeah, whatever.
Anyway, my point is — even with an artificially-induced labour, I still just listened to my body and everything still went just fine! The pitocin started around 5pm, she was born the next morning at 5am, and I walked out of the hospital with my baby in my sling by noontime that same day!
about 1 year ago
Mama&Ellie- Thank you so much for sharing your birth story! Youre so right- your body DOES know what to do. You were so smart to just keep letting your body do what it needed. How discouraging to be in labor all day and feel like youre only a 3. There must have been a reason that your body labored the way it did.
Thank you for you comment. 
about 1 year ago
Heather- Thank you for sharing your birth story. Im so glad to hear that even with the induction due to hypertension- you still worked with your body and were able to have a birth that you feel proud of! Thank you for sharing!
about 1 year ago
Wow! Thank you so much for this. After three unmedicated, uncomplicated births in medical settings where I never had the urge to push, but was told to push (so I did), I was told by physicians that I was the rare woman who never felt the urge to push in labor. I believed that to be true until today. I now wonder if I wold have had an easier time delivering if I would have been allowed to let my babies be in charge. I, too, at 10 cm was told it was time and since I’m done having babies, I’m always going to wonder what that actual natural urge feels like.
about 1 year ago
thanks so much for posting this stuff…im now 3 days over due dates with baby no 4, and waiting very impatiently lol. i am planning on unasisted home waterbirth and this has just reboosted my confidence after feeling quite low for last few days.
about 1 year ago
Jenna~ Please don’t give up on home birth. I live in Nebraska where assisted home birth is not legal (Alabama and Nebraska are the only two states who still have it written into law that a CNM cannot deliver in a home). There are no birth centers, either, and very few CPMs, CMs, or non-licensed DEMs are willing to assist after being threatened with jail time. So for our HBA2C we had to go into labor and drive for four hours, cross two state lines, in the middle of the night, in a surprise snowstorm, to get to a safe and legal home to birth in. People call it extreme, but it was the most lovely birth I could have ever dreamed of at the time. And extreme, to me, was being sliced open for a third time just because a hospital wouldn’t “let” me labor.
I’m now pregnant with my fourth baby and we’re looking at all options…there are plenty of traveling midwives out there, too. Some just hope over a couple state lines and others travel all the way around the world to deliver babies. It’s difficult to label these more creative options as being “extreme” after you’ve witnessed the birth machine alternative.
If anyone is interested, our very long story is here (you can get the gist of it on the first page, though): http://tinyurl.com/3ubb8a
Hugs all around,
~Shaye
about 1 year ago
Interesting…I haven’t had time to read all the comments yet, but I wonder if you’ve addressed people who never feel the urge to push – like me!
With both of my homebirths, even when they were crowning, I could totally choose whether or not to push with the contractions. Two different midwives have thought it was super weird… This last time, toward the end of transition I was encouraged to try pushing to see how it felt. It felt better than not pushing, even though I had a lip both times as well, so I pushed some. But that “uncontrollable” urge so many people describe never came.
about 1 year ago
Sara- I thought about you the entire time that I wrote that blog! I remembered that you didnt have the urge to push! I should’ve probably added a little comment in there- but this works too. The difference between your situation and most everyone else is that you REALLY were one of the rare women that the Ferguson Reflex just doesn’t engage. It could be that your pelvis is shaped in such a way that the baby’s head doesn’t press down hard enough along that nerve to create that urge. One thing that went great in your labor is that Robin let you labor without checking you until it had been long enough and she could tell that things had changed. When she checked you, you were fully a 10 and Audrey was already well on her way (if I am remembering this correctly!). Robin was then able to help instruct you on how to work with your body even without the urge to push. The main focus of this article is when Doctors of midwives try to help “speed things up” by suggesting that mom to push before she has that urge- it can causes swelling of the cervix and mal-positioning of the baby. On the flip side, if a woman were to feel an overwhelming urge and not be fully dilated, she then too need to listen to her body and push. You were listening to your body- doing exactly what this post talks about- your body just wasn’t being the clearest in how it was speaking back to you!
Hope that helps! 
about 1 year ago
great article, thank you . it is so important to remember that our bodies know how to birth !
I do have a suggestion : could you rotate the picture
of the baby about to be born so the mother appears in a position where she is letting gravity work with her.The giving birth laying on one’s back picture is already to common in our society. Thank you , thank you for working to preserve and safeguard natural birth. Blessings. charlotte
about 1 year ago
Charlotte- LOL- I didnt even think about the how this picture is of a woman on her back! How ironic since thats the WORST position to be in! I will change that right away!
Thanks for the suggestion.
about 1 year ago
Very well written, Jules!
about 1 year ago
I agree!!!! I didn’t research this, but seem to come tot he conclusion after hearing detailed birth stories. Time and time again it seems that as soon as the mother reaches 10 centimeters, she is instructed to push. The baby can still be very high in the pelvis, but the poor mom has to work really hard for sometimes what can be hours on end because she is instructed to lie flat on her back and push. I love hoe The Birth Book says that the longer you lie flat on your back during labor, the higher your risk of a c-section. It seems that the baby doesn’t have gravity on it’s side when trying to descend and thus, the mother must do all of the work. Add to that the epidural which can prohibit mother from pushing to her best ability (no pain cues to cause her to give her best energies) and you can have anywhere form one to five hours of pushing before the baby finally comes out! (Side note: Some doctors or mid-wives may not allow you to push this long, depending on whether or not the baby goes into distress or your cervix swells, as stated in your post.)
Sorry, that was a LOT of words only to say that I have come to my own conclusion that women will know when to push and when the urge is there, with proper coaching, the baby should make it’s way out in a very short time. With my two drug-free births, the first took 15 minutes of pushing and the second only took one big push. Trusting your body is part of it and positioning yourself in a way that enables baby to descend is another.
about 1 year ago
Its true.
I had a lip and was told not to push, even though I very much wanted to. I was told that my cervix would swell if I pushed against the lip.
I firmly believe that the stress of not pushing (which is really pushing and not pushing at the same time) is what caused the baby to pass meconium. Now of course that alone wouldn’t be a problem because during labour the baby stops “practice breathing” and “practice swallowing” so they aren’t going to inhale/swallow meconium.
But of course doctors can’t trust the observation of clear amniotic fluid from an hour before. *Sigh*
Even then calling in a neonatologist over the meconium shouldn’t have been a problem, but the specific neonatologist and their specific prejudice about home births… anyway.
about 1 year ago
thank you for this story. I believe I also got bad medical advice, which led me to having a c-section in 1997. I had my three more babies after that, all VBAC (vaginal birth after caesarian) and have four beautiful, healthy babies, but the last one, in 2006, doctors were refusing to deliver VBAC’s. Women should consider this when they consider having a C-Section. It changes everything for the rest of your life. It is unnatural and sometimes harmful, the scar remains on the inside of your uterus and can complicate further pregnancies. If you can avoid it, NEVER LET ANYONE CUT YOU OPEN!!!!!
about 1 year ago
Hello, thank you for sharing these birth stories, it will open the eyes of many!
CONGRATULATIONS to both mothers, and please know that you both can always have VBAC’s
Eunice Romero Licensed Midwife miami fl.
about 1 year ago
Thank you for this post. I am a lucky one I suppose… I had a similar birth story to the women you described in this post, with one difference: I was never told to push. (I think even if I was, I wouldn’t have listened- my body knew better!!) My body did all the work for me… I felt my body pushing my son out, but I never had to actually contract muscles to push. I did not experience pain. It was an amazing experience (the entire birth), orgasmic even, and I will always remember it. I am fortunate that I had a supportive birth staff, even in a hospital setting, with people who understood the natural law of birth. I laugh about it now… the only push I ever gave was to encourage the placenta to come out (which it did with just one little push). My own mother was in disbelief, she thought you always had to push to deliver. It is a common misbelief. I hope we can all work together to change birth experiences to become more positive, more natural, and more blissful- as nature intended.
about 1 year ago
Why do thy do it? I have heard so many similar stories you’d think they would have caught on to the fact that it does NOT help!
Uterine contractions are involuntary ie you cannot consciously control them. The idea that you can effectively ‘poo’ your baby out is ludicrous. Far better to relax & listen to your body that to try & force it & baby to do something they are not ready for.
My first was a hospital ‘push push’ birth & the experienced left me with PND. 2nd & 3rd were both born at home in water using hypnosis – minimal discomfort, totally relaxed and in control. Daddy received baby both times, we stayed in the pool for ages & no-one else touched them for hours. Perfect!
about 1 year ago
I’ve had 2 clients who were encouraged to push “through” a lip of cervix. One the care provider held the cervix back while the mom pushed. It was excruciating, but the mom did it. And then she pushed for about 2 hours after resolving the lip before the baby was born. It was a rough 2 hours, and ended with a generous episiotomy–ironic because the mother had changed from an OB to midwives specifically because she wanted to avoid episiotomy.
With the second case the mom pushed, and pushed, and pushed. She had a nurse who was proud of being a “loud pusher.” That was her own self description–and indeed she was! She loudly counted to 10 with each push. The mom swelled her cervix back to 4, and when she was taken for cesarean, the urine in her collection bag was cherry red. I was told that was because of the hard pushing bursting blood vessels in her bladder!
On the flip side, I had a client who had a lip of cervix just the other day. She was allowed to work through it as her body directed (no pushing in her case), and soon she was ready to push–5 minutes for a 9 lb 3 oz baby.
I also had a lip in my first pregnancy. I was at “9 cm with a lip” for about 7 hours. My care provider was patient. My baby was posterior. When I adopted a hands & knees position she turned, and I pushed for just 20 minutes.
about 1 year ago
Hi, I’m really glad that I found this post. Thank you.
You wrote exactly what I always believed to be true. I didn’t check it myself yet but I will after few weeks. I’m not going to the hospital and I will not give birth with a midwife. There will be only me and my husband so I hope that labor will go very natural.
I strongly believe that my body is fully capable of delivering the baby without any medical assistance as that’s what women’s bodies are designed to do.
about 8 months ago
Thanks so much for posting this. I’m expecting my 6th baby – all of my babies have been born at home. I’m eager to let this baby out on his or her own terms, and not push before I’m ready. We’ll see how it goes.